My life has come full circle and the home that I grew up in now houses my parents, my daughter, my sister, my grandfather and yes me! It is a big house. Unfortunately, my parents didn’t bank on some of us returning before they did away with the second bathroom. My parents have been there for the four of us and everyone else that needed a helping hand and for this we are thankful, but I am starting to wonder if we are causing some unnecessary friction between my parents? Nah… my mom tells me that she and my father were contemplating sleeping in separate parts of the house long before any one of us returned. Somehow, I think she appreciates it more than my dad.
Mom loves it up in the master bedroom; 40″ flat screen, king-size bed; she has everything at arm’s reach. My dad, well I am not sure he would have it this way, but since he retired about 10 years ago he seems to be settling in on the fact that him and my mother do not sleep in the same bed. My heart tells me they fought about it in the beginning, but after all those sleepless nights my mother suffered from my dad’s snoring and not being able to hear the television (she purchased some headphones) and fighting over the television, all the fighting now has nothing to do with my siblings and I being home. I don’t think???
My mother tells me it’s all about the remote control and who has control over the TV first. I could hear them arguing every night about who was going to watch what and when. My dad has since moved into the basement and has fixed it up quite nicely I might add. He has his a king-size bed; 40″ flat screen; a couch, a desk and table. I would say he made out better. It is cool in the summer and warm in the winter. He kicked me out of there though; I now reside in the attic. (Hot as hell in the summer and cold as Alaska in the winter). I don’t complain after all they didn’t have to let me and their granddaughter back into the house.
Nowadays they fight, but it’s not about the remote; it just seems they are getting older and less tolerant of anything!! When dad is downstairs and mom is upstairs there is peace. With all other things considered (my mother hates the home now because dad has gotten lazy and won’t fix anything and dad doesn’t want to move because he is holding on to all of their money). Despite it all, they get along pretty well. After all they have been married for 42 years.
Whenever my father is asked about the secret to their lifelong relationship my dad’s replies, “No one is going to put up with her like I do.” So true indeed and he loves her for the person she is or he would have been gone by now. My mother on the other hand gets to the truth of the matter and says with all the enthusiasm she can muster, “It’s all about the remote.” If you can survive with one remote that is great, but surely we cannot. Separation within the same dwelling was the answer for my parents long-lasting relationship in their later years and will be for the next 20 years. What a great example to follow. It might not work for everybody, but it will work for somebody! Love you mom and dad…
